Financial Independence in Marriage

Posted by: Henry B. | Nov 21,2007


I’m a guy.  Just look at the Married with Children icon, which I have to admit looks eerily similar to myself – though I only need glasses for reading, and sometimes I don’t wear a blue shirt.  And here’s a little secret: my wife is much better about organizing our finances than I am.  Several years back, well in advance of us buying a house, she was very conscientious about determining our monthly budget.  She left no dollar unturned and determined just what we owed every month. 

I’m no slouch.  I pay the bills every month – actually go through the motion of signing the checks, licking the envelopes, and washing the horrid taste out of my mouth.  But my wife is the budgeting king, or queen as it were.  Which is how it should be.  Except for many women this isn’t the case.  Look at this article about women having trouble financially post-divorce.  This is not about the amount of a divorce settlement, but the sheer fact that many women have left financial organization to their husbands and are ill-equipped once they're on their own. 

To all the ladies out there: don’t be this person. Not only is it a point of pride to be in control of your own financial situation, but if a divorce does occur, you will be in a much healthier place, making an unhealthy situation more bearable.  But that’s a pessimistic approach.  Healthy marriages can benefit from two heads working together to better the financial picture.  One person might be better with budgeting, while the other has more talent and enthusiasm for investing.  One might like the thrill of the hunt for better credit card rates.  In short: each spouse brings something to the table. 

Keeping individual credit accounts is advisable as well.  Look at a situation where the woman has been using cards entirely in her husband’s name.  She’s not building up a credit history, making her personal financial situation that much more difficult if she ever wants to exert her independence.  Having two separate, long-term credit histories can benefit you both when it comes time to making a major purchase, such as a home.

This may sound like an article better suited for 1950’s living, as women more and more a part of the workforce, rather than staying at home.  Even entrepreneurial women might leave the family’s financial organization to the husband.  Avoiding this is not only good for personal self-worth, but can also have positive consequences for your family's economic future. 

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